what wire to use for a hat rim

By BOB WIRE

Oh, my poor cowboy lid.

The indignities, the mistreatment, the suffering I've put you through. You lot've been used, abused, treated horribly, and then tossed onto on the scrap heap the moment I no longer needed you. You must have felt like Newt Gingrich's starting time couple of wives.

I've stuffed yous into suitcases and crammed you nether truck seats. I wore you when I was plunged into a dunk tank by a lucky throw (come on, hat, information technology was for a adept cause). I've flung you lot beyond many a crowded barroom, and once fifty-fifty set you on burn. A previous version of yous was stolen, and photographed sitting on dozens of unlike heads around Missoula while I put up flyers trying to notice you lot.

I've slammed you to the basis, sat on your crown, and crumpled your brim until you lot looked similar a love letter of the alphabet that had been smuggled into a prison house jail cell. The hard way.

And then at present, my heavily-autographed sombrero, you take moved on to a better life where y'all'll receive the care and admiration you lot so richly deserve.

And that means it's time for a new hat.

The cowboy hat is a recognizable role of my wait, similar Jack White'south ghostly pallor or Lindsay Lohan'southward court-appointed talocrural joint bracelet. I tend to go through them frequently, and so I've usually picked them up at chiliad sales or thrift shops. I find one that fits my ever-expanding noggin, and then I break 'em in and wear 'em out. I go a lot of mileage out of those things for 5 bucks a popular.

But this fourth dimension I have decided to start with a brand new specimen, a well-baked, sleek Bailey chapeau from Murdoch'due south Ranch Supply in Missoula. It's a top-quality hat, and I'g going to get this thing whipped into Bob Wire shape. Literally.

Shaping a straw cowboy lid is a personal art, and the shape of the chapeau reflects the attitude and personality of its wearer. Case in point: Hank III. That thing he wears is barely recognizable every bit a cowboy lid. It looks similar a flying squirrel that was run over by a breadstuff truck. That makes a pretty big statement nearly how Hank Williams' grandson feels about the country music manufacture.

With a niggling aid from Bob Wire, even a city slicker like you tin can learn how to shape a cowboyhat.

Tim McGraw's hat, on the other manus, is a spotless, focus group-tested black straw icon that is equally clean and straight every bit Taylor Swift. No personality, no deviation from the norm, it'southward as bland as a Big Mac. It'south the sartorial apotheosis of mod country.

My personal hat curve lies somewhere in between these two extremes. My chosen way starts with the crown. I prefer the "constabulary enforcement" style pinch crown over the teardrop, or peaked-front fedora way. That style if I get liquored up and put information technology on backwards, information technology won't be immediately obvious.

In that location are places where yous can take your lid to take it steamed and shaped into the desired mode if y'all don't feel like putting in the try. There are likewise people who will run your dog through the wood, play with your kids, and service your wife. (I hateful, make clean your pool.) But I feel that the satisfaction (and potential second-degree burns) you get from steaming up your own cowboy chapeau is worth the time and effort of doing information technology yourself.

We all have our own method for how to shape a cowboy hat, and I've perfected my approach over several years and several straw hats. (Note: I don't wear felted beaver hats because I don't want anything on my head that's heavier than a pompadour.)

You'll need a few things: a generous teakettle, long-handled tongs (commencement clean off the charcoal-broil sauce), and a metal ladle or the big spoon like the one your mom uses to serve macaroni and cheese.

Cowboy hats come up off the rack with a gentle, ready-to-wear curve to the brim. I'm talking about real cowboy hats, not those rolled-brim fake clothing-and-tear Toby Keith jobs you lot can buy at Hot Topic or a souvenir shop that sells infant alligator heads and kicking-shaped shot glasses. Existent hats start out spotless and subtle.

Some hats feature the currently popular "foursquare front" style, where the front end of the brim is directly across. Others are barely curved, slightly dipping at the front. Either style, you lot could purchase a hat right off the shelf, wear it out of the shop, and within minutes people will be pointing at you and saying, "Hey, a cowboy."

Just that off-the-rack shape is not for me. Nor practise I like the Inferior Brownish/Bob Dylan "taco" style that simply bends the sides of the brim directly up along the crown. While this style enables four cowboys to fit in the cab of a pickup, it's not for me.

And so, let's boil some water.

To exist honest, steam isn't admittedly necessary for a straw hat. Only in my experience, it helps prepare the shape improve.

You'll desire to steam the surface on the inside of the bend. This is where y'all might want to use the tongs to hold information technology over the steam. Hold the surface simply a couple inches from the kettle, and let the steam billow upward effectually the edges. If you did purchase your straw hat at a grand sale or thrift store, at this indicate you'll be smelling all that dust and shady history vaporizing off the lid.

Continue moving the hat slowly so it heats evenly. When the straw is feeling floppy, catch the edge of the brim betwixt your hands and starting time rolling like you're rolling up a beach towel. At the aforementioned time, endeavor to stretch it laterally.

Scroll it so the sides come closer together in the front than the dorsum. If it starts to stiffen upward, hold it over the steam again. That's the beauty part of this: If you overdo it or don't like the shape, you tin always start over. You lot know, like Newt Gingrich.

Keep steaming and rolling, and try to get a good bend going so the front and back droop downward. If yous do this just correct, you'll be able to look into the camera with just 1 centre peeking out from the front end of the brim similar Dwight Yoakam.

Utilise the spoon or ladle to smooth out the inside of the brim against your palm, especially in the back. Information technology'll help you maintain a smooth curve. Important tip: make sure and wash the spoon outset. I once shaped my lid with a spoon that was used to serve sausage gravy, and I was followed around past a herd of feral cats for two weeks.

Shape the chapeau when it's hot and floppy, and when yous go it where yous desire it, wave it around in the air for a scrap to let it absurd and "set."

Straw hats are rimmed with a wire, which enables them to hold the shape. If y'all're similar me, the hat will run into some action that dents it or bends it. Just get dorsum to the teakettle, and you can crank it dorsum into near-new shape in no time.

Null to information technology. Find your own bend, develop your own fashion. Get that hat shaped upward and you'll wait like you were born in the saddle.

*****************

   Check out all of Bob Wire's posts in his blogarchive.

*****************

Recollect of it as Gonzo meets Hee Haw: Missoula honky tonker Bob Wire holds along on a unique life filled with music, parenthood, drinking, sports, working, marriage, drinking, and only navigating the twisted wreckage of American culture. Plus occasional grooming tips. Like the best sense of humor, it's non for everyone. Sometimes silly, sometimes surreal, sometimes savage, Bob Wire demands that you possess a good humor and an open mind.

Bob Wire has written more than 500 sense of humor columns for a regional website over the concluding five years, and his writing has appeared in the Missoulian, the Missoula Independent, Montana Magazine, and his own Bob Wire Has a Point Blog. He is a prolific songwriter, and has recorded three CDs of original cloth with his Montana band, the Magnificent Bastards. His previous ring, the Fencemenders, was a pop fixture at expanse clubs. They were voted Best Local Ring twice by the Missoula Independent readers poll. Bob was voted the Trail 103.iii/Missoulian Entertainer of the Year in 2007.

Y'all can hear his music on his website, or download it at iTunes, Amazon, and other online music providers. Follow @Bob_Wire on Twitter.

copelandtrince1983.blogspot.com

Source: https://www.makeitmissoula.com/2012/09/bob-wire-blog-how-to-shape-a-cowboy-hat/

Share this post